Fear of Flying
by celestialscribe
Summary: Remus and Sirius are travelling to the Quidditch World Cup, but due to Sirius' ill planning they have to go in muggle fashion - by plane. Only thing is, Remus is terrified of heights.


"Moony.."

Remus felt more nervous than on the full moon. His transformations, although anything but desirable, were an all too frequent experience. Flying? Well that was something he'd almost managed to avoid altogether. Remus was terrified of heights. As such, he enjoyed Quidditch from the safety of the ground, and whenever he was forced up the top most tower of Hogwarts Castle – namely the Astronomy Tower – he averted his gaze, usually using the opportunity to notice the finer details of Sirius' features, anything to keep his eyes from the drop that he feared awaited him.

Remus had only been on a plane once in his life. His mother was muggleborn, and every now and then she got it into her head that she wanted to see either this part of the world or that. And this time, she'd decided it was Prague. The flight itself wasn't so bad, but by the time they got to the other end they had been informed that they were missing a stamp on some of the documents, some of _Remus'_ documents to be precise. Only years later did it strike Remus that this hadn't been the case; it was more likely that the guards simply weren't all that keen on letting a registered werewolf enter their country. So all that distance, and facing up to his fear of heights, it had been for nothing. Remus had never seen Prague, nor stepped on foreign soil. On the upside, he was never subjected to another flight from then onwards.

Only the last time he had stepped into a plane, he hadn't actually _seen_ the plane. There had been a bridge; he wasn't too sure what it was actually called, but it connected the gate to the plane and so all Remus had to do was walk a short distance from one seat to another. This time, however, he had to actually go outside, stand beside the plane which looked far smaller than it actually should and wait in agony whilst the other passengers ascended the stairs and _boarded_ the plane. And all the while, his heart was pounding fast against his ribcage as if urging him to go back. His palms grew sweaty, but he tried desperately not to let the flickers of fear that were taunting him, licking his skin like flames, show in his expression. Sirius kept his eyes glued to Remus. He was curious about this muggle form of travel, but not that curious. It all seemed rather primitive, is what he'd said when they first arrived at the airport. Remus laughed, almost hysterically. And the fact that Sirius hadn't called up on it signified that he knew Remus wasn't looking forward to this.

"So remind me why we're going to the Quidditch World Cup the muggle way," Sirius said after Remus ignored him. They'd been sitting around for hours. Sirius was bored, Remus could sense it, but this was all Sirius' fault regardless.

"Because we'd have to schedule a portkey otherwise and they're all booked up. And Sirius, don't say _Quidditch_ or _muggle_ until we get there," Remus answered quietly.

"They're not listening," Sirius said defensively, but he lowered his voice none the less, even more so after Remus gave him a look of severe warning.

"Thanks for doing this again, Moony." Sirius' words were more carefully chosen this time. They shuffled a step or two as the queue shortened, nearing the stairs now, and Remus gulped. Gulped. Remus didn't actually think people gulped when they were nervous. In fact, it was an action that made for bad literature, but it turned out they did. _He_ did, because not only did he hate flying but he hated everything that came after. It didn't escape Sirius' notice either. He grinned, that really obnoxious grin that Remus had come to realise meant they really were Remus and Sirius now. Not like James and Sirius, but _Remus_ _and Sirius_. They were a couple just like any other, and Sirius found Remus' irrational fears adorable. It was ridden on his face, an affection that both pained Remus and sent his soul soaring. But even that didn't settle the fear that was coiling in the pit of his stomach.

Remus' subconsciously eyed the steps as he approached them, gripping one of the straps of his rucksack as he ascended the first step, but he didn't give another second's hesitation.

"Next time, make sure to tell me when you're buying World Cup tickets so we don't forget to actually make travelling plans in time to see the match. _Our_ way, that is. Understood?"

"Yes, Moony," Sirius answered, slipping his hand into Remus' until their fingers interlocked and Sirius was stroking the tender skin at Remus' wrist with the pad of his thumb. Remus cursed under his breath. For whatever reason, they couldn't make a spectacle of themselves. Mostly it was because Remus coveted everything that mattered, the secret of his condition, but most particularly Sirius. If no one knew how much he meant to him, then maybe no one would try to steal him away. There was a war on after all, which even the Quidditch World Cup couldn't drive from his mind.

"But if I'd told you at the time, you never would have let me buy them, what with your precious pride." Sirius' grin widened, and he leaned a little closer, speaking softly so as to make such actions necessary. "Or you'd tear yourself up for weeks for not being able to find a job and some money to pay me back. What if a man just wants to surprise his boyfriend once in a while?"

"Well if his boyfriend doesn't like surprises-"

"But he liked _this_ one," Sirius answered quickly. Remus' brought his eyes to meet his. They were alight with a mix of emotions, an edge of fear, not like when there was a full moon where they were tainted with sadness and remorse, just natural anxiety about flying. But there was also defeat. Sirius had won this battle. Remus may be scared witless at the prospect of boarding the plane and taking off but he was almost as excited as he was at what it meant. After all, he'd never been abroad whereas Sirius had numerous times as a child.

"Your chariot awaits," was all Sirius said. They were now several steps behind the rest of the queue and, after delivering the undeniably cheesy line with as much charm as he was ever capable of (which was alot), Sirius indicated that Remus climb the stairs before him.

Remus' features contorted as one last surge of anxiety took hold of him. "You know, the Quidditch World Cup might be in Britain next year. Maybe Ireland. We could catch a boat."

Sirius merely rolled his eyes at Remus' hopeful expression. "You're a Marauder, man. Don't you remember that time we rode thestrals because Peter dared us to and James and I, and _you_, were bold and courageous enough to do it? You can't even see thestrals and you managed that." Sirius realised for the first time how much Remus must detest heights. After all, the werewolf had been subjected to far worse but had never put up quite as much of a fuss. With a gentle shove, Sirius urged Remus forward, but Remus began climbing the steps only begrudgingly. Sirius continued.

"Besides, the next World Cup might be as far as Mongolia, or Peru. And it's four years away."

"We'll still be here in four years. That is, unless you've given up on me and run off with someone who isn't afraid of heights."

"Shut up, Moony," Sirius said simply, bringing Remus to a halt with a light touch on the arm. Sirius would have kissed him. It felt like those old black and white movies that muggles watch on a quiet weekend, where the heroin runs away with the man she's spent the last 90 minutes or so falling in love with. Sirius nudged Remus' nose with his, and he would have met him at the lips too if it wasn't for the interruption that came in the form of a make-up clad air hostess.

"Tickets, please," she called from inside the plane. Sirius momentarily pretended not to hear her, but Remus immediately dived into his pockets where he had safely stashed their tickets, digging them out before giving Sirius' hand one last squeeze and stepping onto the plane.

There were no reservations for such a short flight, and so they just took the first seats that were available next to each other. Remus insisted Sirius sit by the window. Sirius did, and once more resumed that stance that signified that he was bored and ready to get going already. Remus could still feel his heart tearing at his chest but the hand that gently grasped his knee returned him to the here and now which was Sirius. Even so, his wand was in his pocket and he was glad of it. Remus started reciting the various spells that might come in handy under his breath. Sirius found it all rather amusing until the air hostess pulled out one of her oxygen masks and started giving the safety instructions.

"Moony," Sirius said, his voice wavering slightly with unease. Now it was Remus' turn to be amused. "This doesn't actually happen, does it?"

"How much faith do you have in muggles, Pads?" Remus asked, a smile now playing at his lips at the fact that Sirius was absorbing every word the air hostess gave them.

"So the match…" Sirius said, clearly searching for a distraction. That was when the plane decided to make noises, the various whirrings and clicks, accompanied by the feeling that you were moving even when you weren't. "Prongs and Lily are meeting us there."

"So now you want to plan this? You think now is a good time to make the solid arrangements? To talk over the plan?"

"Moony, I'm a master at planning."

"And yet you failed to plan _this_ and now we're on a fucking plane. Sirius, you know I don't like heights. Magic, magic I understand. But flying, heights.. there's only one thing that I know and that's that what comes up always comes down. Oh Merlin, Sirius, we're moving."

"We're not even in the air yet, Moony. We're just, sort of, sitting. Bloody hell, Moony. This is boring."

"As you've said about a thousand times. Anyway, it's your fault, oh excellent master of planning."

"So Moony, you know that time when I said I wasn't sure if we should move in together?"

"That's the runway, isn't it?"

Remus' gaze shifted past Sirius and out the window, trailing the tarmac which stretched before them just before the plane turned the corner and it was out of sight. Sirius moved to one side so that Remus was _forced_ to look at him.

"You weren't sure either, you see. You just kept playing with your Chinese as if I hadn't even mentioned it, and so I just assumed you weren't ready. And then we played exploding snap, before things got more explosive than we intended.."

"We're going faster. Sirius this isn't like flying on a thestral. It's a bit like flying on your bike, but that's anything but reassuring and I don't think I've ever been on the back of your bike without a drink first-"

"Moony," Sirius said, and pressed a finger to his lips before cupping his chin in his palms.

"I want you to move in with me."

...

"I want you to move in with me, even though you couldn't give me an answer when I asked. And if you really think I didn't have my mates in mind when I bought the flat, than you really are stupid."

"But I'm not just your mate, am I," Remus began, annoyance tugging at his features.

"No. You're not. You have even more reason to me traipsing round my flat naked than anyone, which is inevitable because we all know how much Prongs and Wormtail like to get their kit off when they're blind drunk."

"I guess I do kind of do that anyway."

"I'll take that as a yes. By the way, we're flying. And next time I offer to teach you how to ride a broom, do yourself a favour and say yes? Same goes for the 'moving in' part."

"Understood."

Remus caught a glimpse of a smile on Sirius' lips as he turned to look out the window. They were flying. They were far above the ground now, but Remus was too occupied with the smile that tugged secretly as Sirius' lips as if he didn't want to give it up easily. It wasn't that obnoxious grin. It was something infinitely more sacred. It was smiles like these that were calming, soothing, and brought the world to a still and made everything else seem ridiculous in comparison. The war, Remus' irrational fear of flying, his hesitation when Sirius had mentioned the whole 'moving in' thing all those weeks ago.

"Sirius, have you heard of the Mile High club?"


End file.
